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Women may blame men for impermanent romances, but the problem often lies with themselves, according to Allen, a Los Angeles psychotherapist who leads relationship seminars, and Harmon, a screenwriter and ``instant convert'' to her coauthor's techniques. To encourage a lasting commitment from a man, women are advised here to decide whether playing the masculine or femine role in a relationship suits them best. ``Feminine'' women should seek ``masculine'' men who will cherish their feelings and lead the courtship, even if the woman has a more powerful career. Conversely, ``masculine'' women should seek ``feminine'' men who will take a subordinate role. A ``masculine'' woman should be the aggressor; a ``feminine'' woman should wait to be asked for a date. Case histories abound and a question-and-answer section is included in this how-to guide that underestimates human complexity. (Feb.) (c) Copyright PWxyz, LLC. All rights reserved