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摘要
摘要
Holding Pattern examines the chronically single--the midlife adult who has failed to find the intimacy he or she seeks. Karen Buzzard, noted communication scholar, illuminates how human communication styles influence our capacity for intimacy, tracing the roots of adult miscommunications to three critical stages of development that are crucial in shaping our ability to communicate intimately. Buzzard offers a new and strong theoretical paradigm for intimacy, which does not assume, as does the older paradigm, that intimacy is a process that unfolds naturally and automatically. She develops the critical paradigms of affectional, ethical and authentic communication and explains these patterns through interpretative readings of the life history of individuals, providing a framework for understanding midlife intimacy problems. Using psychological theories of life history analysis, she arrives at a novel picture of how our intimacy styles are shaped. Her case studies are remarkable in demonstrating how the achievement of intimacy involves a crucial shift of direction as we progress from childhood to adulthood.
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Buzzard (Northeastern Univ.) writes about people who reach midlife and find themselves lonely and without intimate relationships. The subtitle is as misleading as it is provocative; it would be clearer as "how misconstrued communication prevents intimacy." Central to the book is the author's conviction that adults can change childhood communication patterns that have impeded their ability to develop fulfilling connections with others. In contrast to the methodology of deferring psychological therapies that focus on the individual, Buzzard recommends a communications approach that examines verbal and nonverbal dimensions of behavior along with the context in which communication occurs. The author organizes the book around three critical developmental processes, which she argues are necessary for intimate communication: affectional (the ability to give and receive), ethical (the ability to take responsibility for actions), and authentic (self-disclosure). Although these designations may appear conventional, Buzzard's development of the categories from a communications standpoint is illuminating. The book concludes with heuristic differentiations between strongly "in-love" relationships and adult intimacy. Recommended especially for students at the upper-division undergraduate level, who will find it a useful resource for courses in interpersonal communication, relational psychology, and family systems. M. R. Grant North Central College
目录
Part I. Intimacy and Adulthood | |
Introduction: The Lonely Heart in Middle Passage | p. 1 |
1 Ur-moments in Communication: Developing an Adult Perspective | p. 13 |
Part II. Affectional Communication | |
2 Getting Enough: Moving from Narcissism to Outward Focusing | p. 27 |
3 Jonathan's Story: A Torn Net | p. 33 |
4 Patching Our Torn Nets: A Stable Base and Consolidation of the Affectional Self | p. 51 |
Part III. Ethical Communication | |
5 Do the Right Thing: Moving from Victimization to Responsibility | p. 69 |
6 Adam's Story: The Glass Prison | p. 79 |
7 Laura's Story: Magnetic Field | p. 91 |
8 Escaping Our Magnetic Fields and Glass Prisons: The Oedipal Complex and Consolidation of the Ethical Self | p. 103 |
Part IV. Authentic Communication | |
9 What We May Be: Moving from too Closed or too Open to Healthy Boundaries | p. 117 |
10 Beatrice's Story: "Conversion" | p. 129 |
11 Ian's Story: "Devotion" | p. 139 |
12 Completing the Self: Identity Resolution and Consolidation of the Authentic Self | p. 153 |
Part V. Your Life, Your Masterpiece | |
13 Conclusions | p. 177 |
Endnotes | p. 189 |